Elmo Lives

So we were busy today. Is it true that idle hands are the devil's workshop? I think so. The more I make myself do, the better I feel. Or to be politically correct the more Becky makes me do the better I feel. We attepmted to ride our bikes with kids in tow up a moutain. BTW kids are heavy. Coasting back down was fun, guess I wouldn't have appreciated it if the way up hadn't been so tough. Do I smell a life lesson? Damn they creep in from every direction don't they?

Among other things I have been amused with in the past couple days is Turner's obsession with Elmo and Brisco Bear. He may not look like me but he does have some of me in him. I loved 2 bears for my entire childhood, and truth be told to this very day. Elmo and Bear have come to life. They eat when and what Turner eats. They must get dressed along with us in the mornings. They go where we go and might I say, they are both very well behaved. Elmo scares me a little. He is a sweet baby monster but something sinester lurks behind those bug eyes. He was a great gift from Turner's Aunt Tara. But something has happened to him. Did the combination of sneeze mist, sour juice and all dirt from every floor he's ever been drug across combine to the perfect potion to bring this inanimate doll to life? I am curious b/c after super Elmo stayed at the table, in his seat. Perhaps to let his food settle? Well, the rest of the family went about our nightly routine. Water the garden, swing a while, baths and getting ready for bed. As we hunted down and collected Bear and Elmo I noticed Elmo had pie crust in his mouth. Strange. Brad had a slice of coconut cream after supper, but ate it while sitting in his recliner. Elmo was at the table. I asked Brad if Elmo had had any of his pie. He looked at me like I was crazy and said no that neither Turner nor Elmo had pie. I think Elmo got up while we were outside and ate the left over piecrust! Sneaky little bastard. I draw the line at stealing food. And if he is alive then he needs to start helping out and doing some chores. There are no free rides in this house.

Another arguement for Elmo's "realness" is that he is ten times dirtier than Bear. Yet they go every where together. Bear is lighter in color and his fur shows dirt easier than Elmo's deep red covering. He is busier than Bear, he must be to get dirtier. I bet he is digging in my garbage can and going outside, wallowing in dirt, when we're not looking

He is the noise I hear at night. He's tip toeing around eating sugary snacks, pulling out toys and watching HBO. It is the only thing I can think of. How else would the house be such a wreck? Surely one toddler can not make this much mess by himself, he must have help.

Turner noticed that I mopped the kitchen this afternoon. He ever so kindly crawled through the dog door and got my potted petunia and pushed it back through the dog door. Then proceded to dump it on my still wet formerly clean floor. I know My Child would never do something like this unprevoked. Elmo was wispering in his ear, I just know it. Perhaps Elmo and Lil Monster know each other. Maybe Elmo invited him over. Who knows?