Mom’s Band Aid

I decided this week that the term "Multi-tasking" was not made to describe business executives who hold conference calls while working on thier PC. Nor was the phrase coined for teenagers who IM, listen to their IPod and do home work simultaneously. No the original multi-tasker had to be a mom.
I figured this out on Wednesday. I had a doctors appointment but decided to take the kids to the park beforehand. After the park I ran home and made Turner and I lunch while breast feeding my daughter. Then I found myself in the tub, rocking Tate's car seat intermittently with my right hand while bathing. My Left hand held my turkey sandwich and I was singing the alphabet with Turner in between bites. This personal three ringed circus is the reason I bathe at night when everyone else has been fed and is asleep. Prior to my soggy lunch on Wednesday I had never eaten in the bath. It wasn't a bad experience, while both are fun separately some things, like peanut butter and pickle sandwiches, just don't go together .
Becoming a mom lets you experience things you otherwise wouldn't. Some are spectacular, you baby's first laugh, you're son's sense of humor. Some are gross- poop running down you stomach while spit up runs down your back. Some are down right strange- I would've never guessed I'd be eating while bathing with an audience watching. But all of it is fun and entertaining.
Turner's sense of humor is developing and he is often unintentionally funny. He watches my every move and is an ever present shadow. Turner was preoccupied while our family was here after having Tate. As soon as the last Grandma boarded a plane he was back with me every second. This closeness doesn't have boundaries, oh no, not even the bathroom is off limits.
I can't believe I am about to tell this, but it's too funny to keep to myself. Mr Nosey came in one day while I was getting a panty-liner out of the cabinet. I figured I could distract him by asking him to go get something for me, I was wrong. He started in " What's that?" "Nothing Turner, it's just something mommies have to use after they have a baby" "It's your band aid?" I thought this would end the inquisition. "Yes." "OK, it's a Band Aid because Tate blew up your belly and broke your butt."
He was satisfied, so he left me, falling off the toilet laughing. These are some of the things no one tells you that will happen. But they will happen and they will keep you smiling on the days that the crying and poop are plentiful