I should be enjoying my last few weeks of being able to sleep through the night, but I'm not. It's two am and I am up. What on earth could tear me away from my bed and my husband? Well, it's a few things that are keeping me up tonight. First there is the heart burn that, no matter how many Tums I chew up, is scalding the back of my throat. There is the sensation that my pelvic bone is about to break in two. There is also my restless mind.
The pain is pretty much self explanatory, but what could be on my mind at this time in the morning? Things of utmost importance: What dresser to buy for Tate? I have been going over my mental check list of things to get prepared before the new arrival. I think the common term for this version of insanity is "Nesting". Nesting sounds like some animalisic task, well it is. I now know why birds tear their feathers out, and rabbits rip at their own fur. Mothers by nature loose their minds shortly before the arrival of their offspring.
Isn't my baby still a few weeks away from getting here? Yes, but I nest when I have the energy. I lost my mind with Turner at about this same time. I mercilessly scrubbed the baseboards and floors of our house for hours, days even. I then rearranged the garage and every room in the house. At the time it seemed perfectly logical for a seven and half month pregnant woman to move furniture.
This time I have left the couch where it is, but I have ripped apart the garage, and rearranged the office, you can come eat off my baseboards too. What is wrong with me? The very tiny part of my brain that can observe this behavior as a bystander is dieing laughing. There is no reason to be up at two am every night, but I am every night. I lay in bed til I can take it no more. Then I get up to spare Brad the tossing and turning.
What do I do every night? Well, I get on line and shop for baby essentials. I can't read product reviews during the day because I am busy with a bucket of Murphy's wood soap, or sewing like a crazy person. This week I found the most perfect crib set, but it was three hundred and fifty dollars. Not even if I had won the lottery would I spend that much on a tiny comforter for a baby. So I decided to make it myself. I bought a pattern, all the fabric, and I am half way done with an exact replica of the overpriced version.
One would think that a couple hours sewing and puttying together "baby things" would be enough to satisfy even the most ardent of nesters. Not so much. I fall asleep at about nine thirty and by one am I am up making lists of things to do, stuff to make, stuff yet to be bought. Needing to lay awake and estimate diaper usage is important you know. Part of my insanity is the fact that my daughter has no nursery. Turner had a beautiful room all ready for him to come home to. Now mind you, he slept in our room exclusively for eight months. But he had a room and I would walk him in there and let him look at it any time he wanted.
Because of the impending move we have decided to for go the nursery til we are moved into the next house. We'll only be here for a few weeks after she's born, so why drag it all out? My mind knows this makes the most sense, my uterus on the other hand is not wanting to hear it. I have turned the office into a mini nursery but it is not appeasing the uterine gods of crazy mountain. I work like Cinderella sewing during every nap time and I am quiet impressed with my wears. I play with Turner the whole day while he's up. I still go to the gym and to play dates. Still cook every day, keep the house straight, all of this every day. So why is it not enough to keep my sleeping a whole night through? My theory is God is preparing pregnant women for the sleepless marathon ahead. I know God knows what He is doing but if it were left up to me I would just assume get to the starting line well rested before I start down the long road of sleepless nights.
So tonight I have looked for dressers, checked fuel economy of all the SUV's I would consider driving, found a dealer for the gun safe Brad and I talked about, compared reviews of the latest Sit and Stand double strollers, gone over what I would like to get finished sewing tomorrow during nap time, and gone down stairs and put on a load of clothes on to wash. Now it's three am and I will at least go lay next to Brad, or as close as I can get without having a heat stroke. Good night, hope someone in the world is having sweet dreams....
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