My new and improved diet plan

We have had the best morning. I got up at five when Brad left to go hunting. I came down stairs and got to work on my Christmas sewing uninterrupted for a couple hours. My kids got up and we had breakfast and got dressed. We went to the gym where I got an hour of clearing my head and the kids got to play with their gym friends.
After the gym we did a little grocery shopping at Publix. For anyone who doesn't know, Publix has the coolest shopping carts in town. They are space ships and have two steering wheels. I got to talk tot he kids the whole morning and enjoy both of them. My kids are funny, smart and of course they get it all from me.
After we got back home it was time to start making lunch. I had the bread and peanut butter out when I noticed Tate acting like she needed to potty. So I stripped her down and plopped her on the potty. We talked for a few minutes but she didn't act like she had to go. I left her bare bottomed and went back to making sandwhiches. She ran off to go play. She came back to me a minute later trying to hand me a fist full of peanut butter. I bent down to take it from her, but it wasn't peanut butter. Oh no, my baby girl handed me a fist full of poop. So gross. I had to scrub her down before she got it all over her. Once Tate was clean I had to find the rest of her deposit. There in my living room on Turner's little wooden rocking chair was a huge pile of terds. My daughter had stood in the chair, squatted down and crapped. She's so dainty and lady like huh?
I disinfected the entire down stairs. I Lysoled everything. I scrubbed poop off of the chair. When all was said and done strangely, I had no appetite for my peanut butter sandwich. This is my new diet plan. I will let Tate crap all over the house and it will deter me from eating chocolate, Reese's Peanut-butter cups and anything else i can think of.
I could not help laughing the whole time I was cleaning. Turner was gagging and asking why Tate had to poop on his chair. The glamorous life of a stay at home mom is always exciting.

Pass the sutures

Last night a tragedy occurred at my house. Brad and I had just tucked Turner in bed and come down stairs to watch TV. We snuggled up on the couch when we heard a pained scream. Turner was panicked because his bear, the beloved Brisco, had a hole in his head.
Brisco has been with our family since the day Turner was born. When he arrived he, much like Turner, was new, so soft, and smelled so good. After four years of being drug around the house, to Walmart, on cross country plane trips, and every other place Turner goes he's looking worse for wear and smells a little. Brisco isn't as plump as he once was. I guess following a busy little boy around is the perfect diet plan. He has been loved nearly to smithereens.
I walked upstairs to see Turner laying in his bed hugging Brisco with big unfallen tears in his eyes. He asked if Brisco would be OK and if I could fix him. I told him of course I could stitch Brisco up and it wouldn't take very long. I came down stairs and did the best job I could performing brain surgery on a VIP bear. Once he was hole free I returned him to a very happy little boy.
Life would be perfect if I could solve all of my children's' future problems as easily as sewing up a toy. I know that soon I will have to sneak bear out of Turner's bed and put more stuffing in him. As he is now, he's little more than a bear skin with no filling. I thank God the He starts everything out small for me. My children were small and easy to handle when I was first blessed with them. Their only problems were poopy diapers and hungry bellies. But as they grew new issues had to be dealt with, but I think I handled all that came my way. I just hope I can keep growing with my kids and always be able to give them the help they need. Even if the help they need means that one day I will have to stand back and watch instead of jumping in.